Sunday, December 30, 2007

Movies I'm Looking Forward To

Cloverfield



Mamma Mia



The Other Boleyn Girl



The Dark Knight

Friday, December 28, 2007

Top 100 Songs of 2007

Because all I do is sit around and make self-important lists, I bring you the largest list of all...my top 100 songs of 2007. Courtesy of downloading music, recommendations from friends, TV shows, the radio. These songs weren't all necessarily released in 2007 (most were) but just the top songs in my life this year. We have everything from R&B to Country to Christian Rock.
I strongly recommend downloading all of them, for free of course.

1 Kelly Clarkson- How I Feel

2 A Fine Frenzy- Lifesize
3 Regina Spektor- Samson
4 The Bravery- Time Wont Let Me Go
5 The Rocket Summer- So Much Love
6 Amy Winehouse- Tears Dry on Their Own
7 Sarah Barailles- One Sweet Love
8 Colbie Callait- Bubbly

9 Mika- Grace Kelly

10 Linkin Park- Shadow of the Day
11 Pussycat Dolls- I Don’t Need a Man
12 Trading Yesterday- One Day
13 Alicia Keys- No One
14 Boys Like Girls- Top of the World
15 Rihanna- Umbrella
16 Diddy and Keyshia Cole- Last Night
17 Cartel- Lose It
18 30 Seconds To Mars- The Kill
19 Skye- Love Show
20 Matt Werts- Everything’s Right

21 Rachael Yamagata- Reason Why

22 Abandoned Pools- Start Over
23 Patty Griffin- Burgundy Shoes
24 Kelly Clarkson- Don’t Waste Your Time
25 Decoder Ring- Somersault
26 Test Your Reflex- I Am Alive
27 A Fine Frenzy- Almost Lover
28 Colbie Callait- Realize
29 Kelly Clarkson- Sober
30 Carrie Underwood- I Know You Wont

31 Amy Winehouse- Back To Black

32 Jon McLaughlan- Beautiful Disaster
33 Matt White- Best Days
34 30 Seconds To Mars- From Yesterday
35 Rihanna- Breakin Dishes
36 Colbie Callait- Batlle
37 Jimmy Eat World- Dizzy
38 Samantha Moore- Cant Replace You
39 Mew- Snowflake

40 Red Jumpsuit Apparatus- Damn Regret

41 James Blunt- 1973
42 Hanson- Been There Before
43 James Blunt- Shine On
44 OneRepublic- Stop and Stare
45 The Buffseeds- Sparkle Me
46 Carrie Underwood- You Wont Find This
47 Daughtry- Over You
48 Aqualung- Something To Believe In
49 Graham Colton- Best Days
50 Paula Deanda- When It Was Me
51 Leigh Nash- My Idea of Heaven

52 Landon Pigg- Cant Let Go

53Amanda Marshall- I’ll Be Okay
54 Paolo Nutini- Last Request
55 OAR- Love and Memories
56 Kelly Sweet- Raincoat
57 Shiny Toy Guns- You Are the One
58 Jordin Sparks- Tattoo
59Ryan Adams- Wish You Were Here
60 Fallout Boy- Me and You
61 Timbaland- The Way I Are

62 Sarah Bareilles- Love Song

63 Acceptance- Different
64 La Rocca- Non Believer
65 Feist- 1234
66 Gym Class Heroes- Clothes Off
67 Him- Wicked Game
68 Kendall Payne- I Will Show You Love
69 Ross Copperman- They’ll Never Know
70 Trading Yesterday- The Beauty and the Tragedy

71 Laura Izibor- Shine

72 Queen- These Are the Days
73 Ray Lamontagne- Within You
74 I-Nine- Seven Days of Lonely
75 Sarah Bareilles- Gravity
76 Rissi Palmer- Country Girl
77 Barlow Girl- Here’s My Life
78 Holly Brooke- What I Wouldn’t Give

79 Shiny Toy Guns- Rainy Monday

80 Bloc Party- I Still Remember
81 Matthew Perryman Jones- Save You
82 Kelly Clarkson- Maybe
83 Gomez- Moon and Sun
84 Rihanna and Neyo- Hate That I Love You
85 Rihanna- Don’t Stop the Music
86 Amy Winehouse- You Know I'm No Good
87 Tim McGraw and Faith Hill- I Need You
88 Joss Stone- Tell Me What We’re Gonna Do Now

89 Rihanna- Rehab

90 Emerson Hart- If You’re Gonna Leave
91 Amos Lee- Sympathize
92 James Morrison- Wonderful World
93 Rilo Kiley- The Moneymaker
94 Paramore- Misery Business
95 Sarah McLachlan- Answer
96 Robert Randolph- Aint Nothing Wrong With That
97 Lifehouse- First Time
98 The Feeling- Love It When You Call
99 Ross Copperman- All She Wrote


100 Meiko- How Lucky We Are

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Sweeney Todd


I’m hard pressed to recall a recent movie that basks in bloody excess as much as "Sweeney Todd:" From the animated blood running through the opening titles to the numerous body parts that paint the floors, walls, and even the characters themselves, we haven’t seen this much hemoglobin in a Johnny Depp film since the infamous blood geyser in "A Nightmare on Elm Street." Yet for all that, "Sweeney Todd" might be director Tim Burton’s most accessible film since…hell, I don’t know…"Planet of the Apes?" The exception being that the former is actually good.

An adaptation of the Stephen Sondheim musical, the film is a cheerfully nasty surprise."Sweeney Todd" succeeds precisely because Burton and screenwriter John Logan balance the large amounts of gore with black humor and not-so-subtle socio-economic commentary.

Todd (Depp) – real name Benjamin Barker – is returning to London in secret after 15 years of wrongful imprisonment. He was once a successful barber, as well as a devoted husband and father, until the lecherous Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman) set his sights on Barker's wife and had him sentenced for a crime he didn’t commit. The newly christened Todd has come back to the city to search for his family. Unsurprisingly, his years away have soured him somewhat on his former home, as he sings:

There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
and the vermin of the world inhabit it
and its morals aren't worth what a pin can spit
and it goes by the name of...London.


And so he ventures off into this wretched hive of scum and villainy. Upon returning to his old house on Fleet Street Todd learns from his neighbor, Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter), that Turpin went on to rape his wife, who then poisoned herself. His daughter Johanna is now trapped in the Judge’s ward. Hopes for a joyous reunion are now dashed, Todd opts for revenge, but when the Judge unexpectedly slips through his fingers, he’s forced to broaden his horizons. He redirects his rage at the rest of the city’s well-to-do residents, murdering them in the comfort of his custom designed barber shop. The fact that Mrs. Lovett’s meat pie business is suffering thanks to a lack of fresh ingredients only ensures that corpse disposal won’t be a problem. They bake meat pies with all the dead bodies. Yum.

Macabre concept aside, "Sweeney Todd" is largely free of annoying Burton trademarks, yet is so undeniably Burton somehow. Granted, London looks every bit as dank and corrupt as Gotham City did in "Batman," but the director exercises a surprising amount of restraint, never allowing the cast to stray into absurdity. Depp and Carter both give moving performances but are, at times, so repetitive that it prevents us from becoming fully involved with their characters, because they almost become characters of themselves. Depp in particular remains withdrawn until the film’s climax, content to let his comically dark circled eyes do most of the work Carter fares better, but we’ve seen her play the off-kilter anti-heroine so many times Mrs. Lovett inevitably starts blurring into Bellatrix Lestrange. It’s hell being a Goth icon, I guess. Sacha Baron Cohen also makes the most of his small role as rival barber Signor Pirelli.

I enjoyed "Sweeney Todd," not just for the gleeful murders, the majority of the songs (especially that cute Johannnaaa song) or the depiction of London as a kind of Victorian meets Goth classic Burton, but because I know a lot of people with no knowledge of Sondheim’s musical (much less Tim Burton) are going to buy tickets for a cute holiday movie starring that handsome Johnny Depp and end up experiencing repeated slices of the neck and twisted cartoony blood. And that thought makes me happy. As it would Sweeney Todd, I'm sure.

B+

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Top 10 TV Shows of 2007

10. The Office

One of the few shows left on TV that actually makes me laugh. Jenna Fishcer is her own star of the show as Pam. Instead of watching Grey's at 9 on Thursdays, America should be watching this. But can we get rid of those over-played hour long episodes please?

9. Gossip Girl

Sex, dirty martinis, pot smoking during leisurely walks through Central Park, bulimia, suicide attempts, affairs. While it remains to be seen if Gossip Girl will take the plot plunge "The O.C." did after its first season, the first half of the season is a completely fresh look at the teen drama.

8. 30 Rock

A refreshing sitcom with a spot-on cast and fantastic writing makes this show more quirky and unique than any other on TV.

7. Desperate Housewives

After the creative slump that was the second half of season 3, and all of season 2, Housewives proved in season 4 that it wasn't just one good season a few years ago. (That was really confusing.) All I know is that this season, besides that lame tornado finale, was really great.

6. America's Next Top Model

I'm addicted to this show. I dont care what anyone says about models. Top Model has brought us some of the most interesting characters on reality TV in the last few years and I'lll say it.
From autistic model Heather, to last seasons runner up Natasha, a Russian girl who married an older American just for a chance at modeling, to Red Bull stealing Bre with that cute-as-buttons voice. Not to mention the inevitable countless fights that take place. God help me if Saturday rolls around and theres a marathon on VH1 or MTV, I'll park myself on the couch alllll day. This show is FIERCE.

5. Pushing Daisies

The new ABC curiosity that goes where no television show has dared go before; or perhaps lack of daring and more because it probably just never occurred to anyone to mix children's fairy tales with violent murder mysteries. Nobody, it seems, except Bryan Fuller. One of the strangest, quirkiest shows in memory. Of course, that almost certainly dooms it to swift cancellation, but hey, you gotta take the good with the bad.

Picture this, if you can: Ned is a boy who discovers he has the strange ability to bring the dead to life with a single touch. Unfortunately, a second touch then renders them dead again, permanently. Which sounds bad, but not as bad as the alternative: if Ned doesn't re-kill them within 60 seconds, some random, luckless soul in the vicinity will have to fill the void by dropping dead instead.

Now, fast forward 20 years and we have the show: Ned is an introverted recluse obsessed with pies, who uses his pie making craft from within a pie-shaped shop called The Pie Hole. He only uses his power for good - that is, for the good of his wallet, as he and his business partner, detective Emerson Cod, cash in on rewards by animating the dead just long enough to get them to spill the beans about their murderer's identity. Add to this curious mix Technicolor sets, semi-immortal dogs and a world populated with the sort of oversized caricatures worthy of Tim Burton and Roahld Dahl, with every adult a bag of nervous twitches and crazy eye patches. All of this presented to you with the help of a creepy narrator.

In total, then, for anyone who remembers being a kid with fondness, and doesn't mind a little dark humor mixed in with their darker humor, Pushing Daisies is such a refreshing show that forces me to still believe in TV. Turn this show into your own fairy tale.

4. Heroes

Even though critics bashed season 2 like a bully bashes a fat kid's confidence, I sort of embraced the darker side. While I completely agreed that those God damned Mexicans needed to die immediately, I don't think season 2 was nearly as bad as it was made out to be. I loved the rest of the additions to the cast and completely enjoyed Matt having a much larger role. People complain that Claire's story is basically a rehash of season 1, well, shes only 17, she dwells and what 17 year old would completely come to terms with a life such as hers in one year? Plus there were some pretty fucking brilliant episode in the bunch. Save the writers, save the show. Muahaha.

3. Ugly Betty

While other shows suffered the inevitable second season slump, Ugly Betty was better than ever. One of the most well put together casts in recent memory. Amanda and Mark are the new Jack and Karen. It irks the fuck out me when people peg this is a family type show, clearly they haven't seen a single episode. There's not one single weak link in this cast. Justin trying to be more like his dead father, Wilhelmina tanking Mode, HIlda grieving over the loss of her fiance, Henry as Betty's dorky boyfriend, Claire Meade as Mark's witty- chain smoking mother. It's just a perfect cast. Fans of "Will and Grace" should have embraced this more sarcastic, more human, and slightly funnier show from the beginning.

2. Lost

Lost's third season had a rocky start and suffered from raising far too many questions while resolving very little - A complaint that the show has garnered quite frequently. But something changed halfway through the season. Suddenly, it seemed like the writers and producers had been listening to fan concerns as they successfully resolved many lingering plot points and gave us a renewed interest in the series' core mysteries.

This season is easily broken down into two separate parts; the first six episodes that aired before an eight week hiatus and then the rest of the season. Even though the first six are considered part of the third season, they feel much more like a prologue. Very little time is spent with the survivors on the beach and the main focus of the story is Jack (Matthew Fox), Kate (Evangeline Lilly) and Sawyer's (Josh Holloway) imprisonment by the Others. These episodes did have their moments (fish biscuits anyone?) but ultimately they felt like one big tease with very little being resolved and more answers surfacing. Sounds like typical Lost, right? Well it seemed at the time that fans had had enough as ratings began to slip and a backlash against the series began mounting. I was even prepared to throw in the towel, and thats saying alot. ABC appeared to be losing faith in their show as they shifted Lost to the ten o'clock timeslot and away from the ever so popular American Idol. This is when everything changed.

The best way to describe the show's resurgence in season three's second half is to look back at an article I read on IGN in November of 2006. IGN TV published 50 Lost Loose Ends and to be honest it wouldn't have been surprising if I could have come up with 50 more. Out of those 50 loose ends, around seven have been answered. Now that may not seem like a significant amount but when we are dealing with subjects such as the origin of Locke's (Terry O'Quinn) paralysis, "Why do the Others want children?" and the radio tower, it's hard to be disappointed. On top of that, there were several more loose ends dealt with in a significant capacity and numerous other mysteries explored that weren't even on the list. Not bad for a show that is often criticized for not delivering answers.

The second half of the season also featured some of the show's best episodes to date. Including the brilliantly told "Flashes Before Your Eyes", which is an interesting twist on Lost's somewhat stale flashback scenario. Other episodes like "The Man from Tallahassee" and "The Brig" answered long asked questions while "The Man Behind the Curtain" and "One of Us" gave us a much needed back-story on both Ben (Michael Emerson) and Juliet (Elizabeth Mitchell). Really, the only weak point of the final sixteen-episode run would be "Stranger in a Strange Land", an episode that primarily focused on the origins and meaning of Jack's tattoo. We still don't really understand the significance and we're not too sure if the writers do either as they never bring up the subject again for the rest of the season. Even "Expos¿", an episode that featured fan-hated Nikki (Kiele Sanchez) and Paulo (Rodrigo Santoro), told an interesting "Twilight Zone" style story and we couldn't be happier with the conclusion. They died, cause they sucked, to put it bluntly.

If you were to suggest that the theme for season one was man vs. the unknown and that season two's was man vs. machine (the button), it would be fair to suggest that the theme for season three is man vs. man, as the main core of the season deals with the survivors of Flight 815 dealing with the Others. There is a constant power struggle between the two groups and the narrative frequently shifts back and forth from the Others camp to the survivor's beach. Intertwined throughout, are personal struggles for several of the characters in both camps and we realize as the story pushes forward that even though they are enemies, their survival appears to be dependant on each other.At the core of this struggle is Benjamin Linus, and it would be a sin not to mention Michael Emerson's fantastic performance as the enigmatic leader of the Others. He never once falters in portraying a creepy and unnerving nemesis for the survivors of Flight 815 and in particular, John Locke. Terry O'Quinn puts in an equally inspired performance and every time these two appeared on screen together, you knew something special was about to happen. Other standout moments are Locke seeing Jacob (creepy as fuck), Jack and Kate's one moment of acting in 3 years when they are sitting on a chair saying goodbye in otherville, plus Juliet and Desmond and are awesome.

The others, fish biscuits, Ben and Juliet and Jacob added up to a worthwile season, perhaps even topping season 1

1. Brothers and Sisters

While it's always fun to watch a bunch of people stuck on an island being chased around by black smoke. Its slightly more refreshing to watch a show with no gimmicks. Pretty much every program I mentioned on this list has some sort of gimmick attached to it in some form. Brothers & Sisters is the one show that seriously reaffirms my belief in TV. It pretty much reinvented the family drama by dealing with a perfect mix of real issues mixed with witty authentic banter. Come to think of it, everything about this show is authentic and that seems to be the perfect word to describe it. From its actors (Rachel Griffiths and Sally Field) to its storylines (Justin's drug addiction, Sarah's pending divorce, Kitty's black sheep Republican ways in a family of Democrats), not to mention the ballsy choice to have 2 main characters (Kevin and Saul) be gay. If there's one show that really strikes a note with me this year, its Brothers & Sisters. The toss up between Lost and this to be at number one was ultimately determined by the fact that Brothers & Sisters relies on the art of storytelling and acting more heavily than any other show on the list. And that is to be commended in a tv world full of gimmicks.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

I Am Legend


A well-made horror/sci-fi flick is often, sadly, the exception. Films like Children of Men and The Descent have taken a notoriously bad genre and made it good again, moving past the era of Resident Evils into a realm of well made films that can actually grasp a mainstream audience.
Director Francis Lawrence's I Am Legend follows suit into this new horror/science-fiction genre with a hugely successful opening weekend and box-office estimates of $77 million. The film works on many levels: Will Smith's acting is adequate and the movie delivers action and suspense while maintaining an eerie quietness throughout the entire film.

Will Smith is Dr. Robert Neville, the seemingly sole survivor of a global pandemic, a viral infection that was once thought to cure cancer turned the majority of the world's population into darkseekers -- rabid, zombielike vampires.

This third big-screen adaptation of the '54 novel by Richard Matheson jumps off on a high note visually. Neville's relationship with his dog Sam is endearing, and his occasionally ridiculous banter with mannequins arranged in varying locations around the deserted metropolis is creepy. Lawrence captures the unsettling atmosphere of a post-apocalyptic landscape using silent, panning shots to show how nature is rapidly reclaiming New York City: Waist-high weeds push through deteriorating asphalt, deer leap around rotting, rusted, abandoned traffic jams. Neville suffers through each day by sticking to a tightly controlled schedule, his meticulousness largely responsible for his survival up to this point. The unimaginable loneliness he faces seems as big as the empty city itself.

(Side note: Before we get too deep, though, did anyone else notice during an opening shot, sandwiched between posters for Broadway shows, there was a billboard showing the Batman symbol with the Superman logo superimposed over it and the date, 6.15.2010, etched below both? Could it be a nod to a future Batman versus Superman movie (a la Frank Miller's
The Dark Knight Returns)? I'm guessing it's more likely a possible reference to the upcoming Justice League movie, slated for 2010, which will star both Superman and Batman superhero characters -- but if you've got an inside scoop, feel free to share the knowledge goodies.)

Moving on: After we witness more of Neville's daily routine, and begin to feel a fleeting sense of safety in the OCD rituals that appear to keep him safe, Neville decides to trap a zombie for vaccine tests, triggering a series of events that accelerate the film toward its finish.
Spoilers ahead. (I've realized that I will likely almost always spoil movies, whatever furthers my review.)

Here's what happens: Neville lays a trap to capture a subject for a vaccine survivor, after which he's baited and trapped in a nearly identical manner. He escapes but at the loss of his canine companion, sending Neville on a reckless murder spree, which nearly costs him his life -- before being rescued at the last minute by Anna, another survivor with immunity. His hazy ride back to his place includes glimpses of a big ol' glittery cross hanging from her review mirror. Here's the final act: Neville's vaccine works, but the light-phobic zombies have since either triangulated or sniffed out his house, because once night falls, they're heading his way.

Fight scenes ensue, Neville realizes the vaccine is working on his latest test subject, hands off a vial of cure-containing blood to Anna, shoves her into a bomb shelter of sorts, and faces an onslaught of baddies with a hand grenade. We then see Anna and her son driving through Vermont foliage to a utopian survivors colony. Anna's closing voiceover indicates the titular "legend" is Neville's heroic death to pass on a cure to humankind.

Her brief outro completely ruins the darkly clever play of the book's original plot -- that Neville is a legend, hated and feared, among the vampiric society as a vampire killer, as vampires were once a legend in human folklore. For a moment, the reader is awarded a fresh perspective from a unlikely vantage -- Neville, hunter of vampirekind, is seen as freakish monster, the villain. Granted, in this adaptation, Earth's sole survivor doesn't seem to hunt the ghouls but he apparently capture the zombies for unsuccessful vaccine trials -- did you see that wall of creepy Polaroids?

My only beef with this film is that it could have been a little more and a little better. But overall, for a Will Smith horror film. I Am Legend is more focused on sublte scares rather than cheap thrills, and we love that.

B+



Sunday, December 16, 2007

Top 15 Trainwrecks of 2007

15. David Hasselhoff
"Hi I'm disgusting."

While some stars make headlines by having "sex tapes" released, actor David Hasselhoff had his own tape going on air and streaming online, showing him completely drunk while trying to eat a hamburger, and having his 16-year-old daughter begging him not to drink anymore. Pathetic. Even for someone who starred on Baywatch.

14. Beauty Queens
"Hi, I'm stupid."

Between Miss Whatever checking herself into rehab, and Donald Trump coming to her defense. And Miss Nobodycares "such as, such as South Africa and Iraq...such as" blithering foolishly while America watched (or didnt watch, but rather youtubed the day after) make fools of themselves. It's no wonder we stereotpye pageant girls. When all else fails, talk about South Africa and Iraq, there's always something going on there.

13. Ann Coulter
"Hi, I'm a demon."

This demon personified is the exact reason we dont trust the republican party. She represents everything negative in a conservative. Here is an adult who has the nerve (or stupidity) to call John Edwards a faggot and think it's okay and justifiable. But what was even more reprehensible, was that after she said it, her audience laughed. Then goes on national television and exploits a woman who is dying of cancer, yet later claims this same woman, Elizabeth Edwards, exploited her own son's death. Plus she calls the 9/11 widows a bunch of harpies. Bitch is crazy.

12. Elizabeth Hasselbeck
"Hi, I'm clueless."

After watching this unfounded neo conservative spew her pathetic beliefs on The View for the last four years, Hasselback met her match with none other than Rosie O Donnell. While Rosie may have gotten more shit from it, it was Elizabeth whos colors were finally shown. Just how disloyal and absurdly ridiculous she really is. Whiny shrill.

11. Anna Nicole Smith
"Hi, I'm irrelevant, even in death."

After killing her child (yea I said it), and dropping to her own irrelevant death, the trainwreck of a life that was Anna Nicole finally came to an end this year sparking off a custody battle between two men who nobody cares about. Not to mention her "unremarkable" anus. Still dont get that one.

10. Larry King
"Hi, I'm Jesus."

Yet again, another living corpse. This 347 year old skeleton is still on tv and nobody knows why. He asks nonsensical questions. Everyone has their time Larry, yours is up. Please get your wrinkles and off-colored ties off my tv.

9. Amy Winehouse "Hi, I'm a rockstar cliche."

While probably the most talented person on this list. Amy Winehouse skanked her way into the U.S. by leaving her hotel rooms filled with blood and needles while being photographed lookin all anorexic at the early AM hours. Not showing up for concerts, but when she does she spits on her audience for not knowing the lyrics. Another rockstar cliche who didn't even have time to blossom fully.

8. Donald Trump "Hi, I'm a sexist pig."

Denying claims of going bankrupt, calling Rosie a fat disgusting pig on national tv. This sexist assface of a human being clings to his former hit tv show "The Apprentice" like his former wives cling to ther alimony payments. Try finding a wife who isnt a golddigger, and before you claim other people are ugly both inside and out, try fixing yourself, and that hair.

7. Ted Haggerd
"Hi, I'm in denial."

It's always those holier than thou asshole conservatives who get caught fucking people of the same sex. This leader, and we use that word loosely, of the Evangelical party who is notorious for bashing gays was revealed to once have a previous affiar with another man. But then claims to be "cured" of his homosexuality. Christ, nuff said.

6. Britney Spears "Hi, I'm batshit crazy."

Quite possibly the biggest disaster since Katrina, this former talentless teen star went balls to the walls batshit crazy this year. Attacking cars with umbrellas, shaving her head, releasing a god awful video for Gimme More, that performance on the VMA's which reminded us of a drunk 6 year old on speed (somehow) reaffirmed why Britney needs to get rid of her entire team of people, and grow the fuck up already.

5. Don Imus
"Hi, I'm ignorant."

This classless shock jock stepped over the line this year when he called the Rutgers women's basketball team a bunch of nappy headed hoes. He was fired from radio, but eventually signed another contract, thus reinstating what everyone already knows about tv and radio. You can be as much of a complete racist dickhead as you want, we'll send you away for a little while, pretend we care then you'll come back and gift wrap your apology and all will be forgiven...as long as you make us money.

4. Isaiah Washington
"Hi, I'm afraid of gay people."

After calling one of his co-stars a "faggot" last year on the set of Shit's Anatomy, Washington was eventually fired from his job. He later apologized and was sent to "gay rehab", but only after there was a threat to his working. Washington used the word again in his denial at this years Golden Globe awards. Yet again reaffirming why remorese doesnt come in gift wrapped apologies.

3. Larry Craig
"Hi, I'm lying to myself."

This congressman who was known for his ultra conservative views on anti gay rights was literally caught with his pants down in a public restroom asking for sex from another dude. Yet again another complete hypocrite emerges from the Republican party. Whats wicked and immoral is a grown ass man who is supposed to be representing this country found in a airport bathroom soliciting himself.

2. Paula Abdul
"Hi, I'm out of my fucking mind."

Just go youtube a clip from her show "Hey Paula" and you'll see why shes # 2 on this list. A woman who dedicates an entire 6 episode tv show to prove to the public that the reason shes so fucked up is because she doesn't sleep? Hello, how bout instead of demanding your driver pay for Starbucks at 3am...you just go home and sleep. Duh.

1. George Bush "Hi, I haven't learned the English language yet."

There's not enough words to describe what a foolish man we have running our country. Or wait, yes there is "Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be here somewhere." or "I am the master of low expectations." or " Wow, Brazil is big." or "If this was a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier." or " I want everybody to hear loud and clear that I'm going to be the president of everybody." or " See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda." or "In terms of timetables, as quickly as possible- whatever that means." or " They misunderestimated me."
How people can still defend him is beyond me

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Southland Tales for Old Men

Southland Tales

There's always something to be said for a filmmaker interested in pushing himself creatively, challenging his audience and testing the boundaries of narrative cinema -- that is, unless the end result is Southland Tales. Well, maybe not. I didnt necessarily dislike this movie. But it wasn't anything fantastic either. Especially in comparison to Donnie Darko, Richard Kelly's sophomore effort is obnoxiously over the top. But in even the most forgiving context, the film is still just insane.

Any plot description inherently fails to do the "story" justice, but here goes: The Rock plays Boxer Santaros, who surprisingly, is actually really good in this film, is an amnesiac movie star who wakes up one day to learn that he was kidnapped and drugged for some unspecified purpose by an unseen organization. Although he is married to Madeline Frost (Mandy Moore), he shacks up with Krysta Now (Sarah Michelle Gellar), a porn star trying to go legit with a barrage of media ventures, including a script that predicts the end of the world. In the meantime, a Neo-Marxist group kidnaps hero cop Roland Taverner (Seann William Scott) in the hopes of using him as a political pawn against the government; and Private Pilot Abilene (Justin Timberlake) watches over all, offering his own prophetic wisdom, recitign Bible quotes, as these various groups converge on a seemingly inescapable path of destruction. Too much? Thought so.

The first real note I took while watching Southland Tales was this: "How does a movie that explains so much make so little sense?" Aside from the film's central, overlapping plot lines, Southland Tales serves as a fairly heavy-handed commentary on celebrity culture, political manipulation and media saturation, and the combination of so many different themes -- all of which he attempts to explore with equal depth -- makes for a nearly incomprehensible film. But becuase I'm fucking brilliant when it comes to watching films, I understood it. But If you dont, I cant really fault you for it. or care.

No doubt, there are those who will say this film is fantastic, that anyone who doesn't like it, clearly didn't understand it. (I hate those people.) Well I'll play both sides, and say I half agree. Sure, you might be left with the impression that only Kelly himself knows exactly what is going on, but Southland Tales deserves to be embraced with open arms (and mind) on some level in a season otherwise filled with bland Christmas movies. So, its an incoherent mess at times, but I've decided to embrace it, sort of.

Southland Tales is the kind of movie that could gain classic status if it came together as successfully as it must have been imagined in the filmmaker's head. Plus Amy Poehler and Cheri O Teri are in it. So thats a plus.

B


No Country For Old Men

Lately it seems my taste in moves has seriously been lacking. Count this film in as one that will go on the list of "films everyone loves but I think is just okay." For the life of me I cant figure out what the fuck is going on with cinema recently. I just found out today that two films I absolutely hated (American Gangster and Eastern Promises) were nominated for best film of the year at the Golden Globes. Wtf? And Into the Wild was left out? I dont get it. I feel like people are being told what to like.

While "No Country" was considerably better than both those films, it still wasn't anything to hit the bong over. Do not believe the hype that surrounds this movie. I'll give it credit though, for being a sort of western and not boring me to tears. In fact, I was never bored. For being an almost silent movie, I kept interest the entire time, but thats only because I was expecting some sort of pay off, of which there was none.

Defying the normal audience’s appetite for a meaningful resolution, "No Country for Old Men" ends with a whimper rather than a bang. To a certain extent, this is faulted by the plot of the Cormac McCarthy novel, about whose work I have nothing to say because I dont care enough to read his book. I am going to reveal the conclusion of the movie momentarily so those that plan to spend ten dollars or more to be ultimately disappointed should read no further.

There are three major characters in "No Country." In the opening scene we are introduced to Llewelyn Moss (Josh Brolin in an impressive performance), a Vietnam veteran who is hunting deer or something in the backcountry where much of the action takes place. He happens upon the aftermath of a drug deal gone bad, with dead or dying Mexicans lying on the ground next to their all-terrain pickup trucks equipped with high-power spotlights (a racists dream.) After Moss notices a briefcase containing two million dollars, he takes off with it in a gesture highly reminiscent of the characters in the old westerns.

Hired to track down the cash is Anton Chigurh (Javier Bardem), a hit-man who lugs around a stun-gun with a captive bolt that is ordinarily used for killing cattle. Chiguhr uses his to knock out the locks on doors behind which reside his intended victims or to knock out their brains slaughterhouse-style. Of unknown nationality, Chigurh is occasionally inspired to play with his intended victims, allowing them to toss a coin to decide their fate. His character is a mixture of a less interesting version of the Samuel Jackson hit-man in "Pulp Fiction." Even though Bardem is chilling as Chigurh.

The third major character is Sheriff Ed Tom Bell, played by Tommie Lee Jones. Ed Tom Bell? Whatever, over it. Sheriff Bell never really gets involved in apprehending Chigurh or any other bad guys. His main purpose is...well, I don't really know. At one point, Bell tells a colleague that everything started going downhill when young people began to dye their hair green and put spikes through their noses. Or when I was led to believe this film was a brilliant work of art.

The movie actually moves along quite nicely until the final fifteen minutes or so. It consists almost entirely of Chigurh trying to track down and kill Llewelyn Moss in a manner that evokes actual suspense and creepiness. After Moss blasts him with a shotgun, Chigurh retreats to a seedy motel ("No Country" is filled with some of the scuzziest motels and hotels ever seen in a film, unless we're talking about porn) and performs surgery to remove the shotgun pellets from his knee.

Up to this point, you are expecting a grand finale with the three major characters shooting it out. You hope for Llewelyn Moss to come out on top, since his character is especially engaging and resourceful. I was expecting a shoot em up style blowout. However, Moss is killed off before such a climax can even take place The Coen brothers have him killed off-screen. The fuck? Once he is gone, you really lose interest in the film entirely. What the fuck is that about? The film ends with Bell recounting a dream he had the night prior, to his wife. Then it just ends. The movie ends like that. While not totally sucking balls, this movie was good at best, and mediocre at worst. And most certainly not the Oscar-buzz type film its being made out to be. Classic case of "just go watch a movie not expecting anything." Because it doesn't suck. It just didn't live up to the hype.

B-

Sunday, December 9, 2007

My Top 15 CD's of 2007

15. The Gossip- Standing In The Way of Control

Download these:
Your Mangled Heart
Standing In the Way of Control


14. A Fine Frenzy- One Cell in the Sea

Download these:
Lifesize
One Cell In the Sea
Almost Lover
Ashes and Wine
Come On, Come Out


13. Hanson- The Walk

Downlaod these:
Been There Before
Watch Over Me
Go
One More

12. Rilo Kiley- Under the Blacklight

Download these:
The Moneymaker
Smoke Detector
Give a Little Love
Dreamworld


11. OneRepublic- Dreaming Out Loud

Download these:
Stop and Stare
All We Are
Prodigal
Come Home
Say (All I Need)


10. Jimmy Eat World- Chase This Light

Download these:
Dizzy
Carry You
Always BeB
Big Casino
Chase This Light

9. Sara Bareilles- Little Voice

Download these:
One Sweet Love
Gravity
Love Song
City
Between the Lines


8. Carrie Underwood - Carnival Ride

Download these:
I Know You Wont
The More Boys I Meet
You Wont Find This
So Small
Twisted
Last Name


7. Amy Winehouse - Back To Black

Download these:
Entire CD


6. Shiny Toy Guns - We Are Pilots

Download these:
Rainy Monday
Le Disko
Starts With One
Waiting
You Are the One


5. Colbie Caillat - Coco

Download these:
Realize
Battle
Midnight Bottle
Bubbly
Oxygen


4. Paramore - Riot

Download these:
That's What You Get
Let The Flames Begin
Misery Business
Hallelujah
Born For This


3. James Blunt - All the Lost Souls

Download these:
Shine On
1973
Same Mistake
Carry You Home
I'll Take Everything


2. Rachael Yamagata - Happenstance

Download these:
Every song


1. Kelly Clarkson - My December

Download these:
How I Feel
Don't Waste Your Time
Sober
Judas
Maybe